An “Apawlogy” Letter from Dog
Doggone it! I apawlogize for letting the cat into the Dognition social channels, dear humans. I was having a ruff day. My stomach was growling, and the cat offered me a bacon-flavored pupsicle. He seemed nice, but he was just pulling my leash! Furgive me — I’m pawsitively embarrassed!
I woof you! Please furgive me!
Look, I know what you’re thinking. “Dog, how could you let a cat — a cat! — onto the blog?” In my defense, he wore a lab coat. He had a clipboard. He said his name was “Science Cat” and that he had been peer-reviewed. I am a very trusting animal. That is literally my whole thing.
In hindsight, there were warning signs. The tail flicking. The way he kept knocking my water bowl off the counter “for research.” The moment he asked whether the Wi-Fi password was DOGSRULE so he could “fact-check” me. Classic cat energy. I should have known.
So today, on this most solemn of holidays (April 1st), I am here to grovel. I have chewed a slipper of contrition. I have rolled over three times. I have offered my belly to any human who will accept my apawlogy. In exchange, I ask only for a small biscuit and the return of my administrative privileges to the Dognition Instagram account.
And to my cat colleague: this is not over. Next April 1st, I am coming for the newsletter.
-Dog
P.S. Happy April’s Fools Day from Dognition!
